A lot of us know how it feels to lose our hard-on when we try to put a condom on. And it’s a waste of time trying to put a condom on a dick that’s not fully hard. But it’s important to remember that erections come and go during sex and few of us stay rock hard from start to finish, with or without condoms.
Here are some tips if putting on a condom gives you erection problems.
Larger condoms
If a condom is too small it will be harder to get over the cock and feel uncomfortably tight to wear. Condoms come in larger sizes, either wider or longer (or both). These can be up to 1.5cm wider and 4cm longer than regular size rubbers. Examples include Durex Comfort XL and Mates Large. Bigger brands often have ‘XL’ or ‘XXL’ in their names. The measurements are usually stated on the packet.
The ‘sock’ method
If putting a condom on kills your hard-on some men find this helps: instead of putting the condom on the tip of their dick and rolling it down, they put it on like putting a sock on a foot. With thumbs holding the mouth of the condom open wide, it’s pulled over the head of the dick. Once on it can then be rolled down the dick as usual. Although handling and stretching the condom this way might possibly weaken the rubber, for some men this is a real help in getting a condom on.
Cock rings
Anything that keeps blood in a cock once it starts to get hard will help it stay erect. Gripping the base of a dick can do this for a while, e.g. while the condom goes on. But a cock ring has the same effect for a longer time. They can be metal rings or adjustable straps made of leather (these are better than metal rings as they can be adjusted to fit and can be taken off more easily, even when a cock is still hard).
A helping hand
Concentrating on the fiddly business of putting on a condom can cause a man to go soft. So it can help if he gets the other guy to put the condom on for him, especially if that guy’s stimulating a part of his body that gets him hard.
Other worries
Some men find a few quick tips can’t fix their anxieties around using condoms. Sometimes it can be hard getting the other man to agree to use them. Then talking anonymously to someone on a helpline like THT Direct (08457 12 21 200) or to a counsellor or a sex therapist can really help. You can ask for help from a sexual health advisor at a sexual health clinic or contact a local gay men’s health or safer sex organisation – they’ll know where you can talk to a professional about this problem. Many Terrence Higgins Trust offices across the country offer free sex counselling. For details click here.
